How to Improve Your Relationship With Money

 “How to Improve Your Relationship with Money”


Just like you have relationships with other people, you have a relationship with money. First, decide that your money is important to you and worth spending time with. If you’re in a relationship with someone and you tell them “you’re just not that important to me,” how long do you think they’re going to stick around?

Do you keep your cash organized in your wallet or crumpled up in wads around the house with piles of loose change? I encourage you to treat your money with respect.

When money is important to you, you are willing to spend quality time with it, just like with someone you’re dating. Schedule a regular time to give your money your full attention.



During your “Money Date,” you can find out how your money is doing by reviewing your financial statements, balancing your checkbook, or reconciling your accounts.

In the past, when I didn’t have a regular “Money Date,” I handled my finances randomly. I would balance my checkbook and pay bills when I got around to it, which meant that sometimes I was organized and sometimes my finances were in total chaos. I wasted hundreds of dollars in fees that could have been avoided if I was monitoring my finances more closely.

Now that I have regular and consistent “Money Dates,” I have clarity around my finances, and I make better decisions. I love it, and I believe that you will, too.

Please comment on this post and let me know how this experience is for you.


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  1. Mary Mascaraque says:

    First of all thanks a lot for your helpful posts, your comon sense, your honesty, your clarity and good heart. Wish you much more Prosperity.
    Second, You are RIGHT. We mus learn to deal with money, althouth in my case I must come back to the origins, in which money was for me like a baby that needed feeding everyday and it was, thus, growing and my love for him too.
    Thanks gain

  2. Lena says:

    Hi PJ,
    Great idea, I’m going to schedule a money date in my calendar, every week!

  3. This is something I have to really get down to doing PJ, thanks for the inspiration :-)

  4. Janelle Alex says:

    Dearest PJ,

    I love that you mention how we need to respect money. If we send negative energy (thoughts, feelings, words, fear) towards it, negative money energy is what we will get back. So, by organizing it neatly in your wallet, making a date with your money we can begin to send out loving positive energy towards money. And, of course, what do we get back then? :) Positive money energy! Yay!

    It always annoys me when a cashier or bank teller hands me money that is facing different directions or really dirty or crumpled or torn. I have always wanted it neatly organized, but I am not sure I realized it was a matter of respecting my money until now.

    Thank you!!

    Janelle Alex, Ph.D.
    Soul Collaboration Guide
    Inward Oasis

    I offer you my free gift:
    Quick Start Guide to Recover YOU

  5. I was just thinking of doing something similar to this today. Now I have a name for it. Money Date! Thank you PJ.

  6. Josie McHale says:

    You said it PJ! Having clarity around money, where it is , where it is going, how it is being made and what you need to do with it now and in the future is so important in any person’s success. After all, your relationship to money is your relationship to value. At least, that’s what I believe in. Thanks for the post!

  7. Carol says:

    A Money Date- great idea. I do need to show more respect to my money. I am one who leaves it lying around. Will fond it in pockets after many months. No more! I will learn to respect my money!

  8. Peggy Lusk says:

    I love your “Money Date” idea, P.J!! I will definitely add that to information I give people who are struggling with starting to track their money..

    Peggy Lusk, CPA
    Abundance by Design

    Get your free report:
    “The Relationship Between Time and Money”

  9. Mary Joyce says:

    I love the idea of a money date , since I’ve started treating my money well and respecting and everything it does for me Its started flowing and coming easily . Thank you as the more reminders of treating it well the more it get built into the muscle
    Thank You PJ You Totally Rock

  10. Love it! I’m going to go make a date with my money right now! I also like to keep a Prosperity Jar on my desk. My husband always adds any leftover change or bills to it, and says, “Just priming the Pump.” It’s amazing how different your relationship is with money when you actually handle it every day instead of just relying on digital transactions. :-)

  11. Wendy Reese says:

    This is the 2nd time this message has come to me. I think it is time to start paying attention ;) Thank you for the lovely reminder!

  12. Kristy says:

    I have a money date this weekend to prepare our 2nd Quarter family financials. We love seeing how much we saved. Even if we spend too much in a category, it *does* alter our behavior, and that’s a good thing.

    Kristy Schnabel
    Virtual Assistant
    It’s Virtually Done, LLC

    Get my free report “10 Ways to Increase Your Marketing Presence” here:

  13. Lynn Smith says:

    Awesome information PJ! Love the concept of a Money Date!

    Lynn Smith
    Joint Venture Women

    You’re invited to sign up for “Tips, Tricks & More at

  14. Takara says:

    Once again, Pj, you are offering great advice. I love how practical the things you suggest are. I’ve always found that whatever I treat with respect, or give my attention to, tends to grow. Money is no exception. Thanks again.

    D. Takara Shelor
    Forchianna L.L.C.

    Get 2 free ebooks:
    Dancing With Dolphins & Life Works When You Are Happy, It Sucks When You Are Not

  15. This is a great idea! I, like most entrepreneurs, don’t relish doing the finances and tend to squeeze it in as an afterthought. By setting a date, it prioritizes finances the way they should be and it blocks time out for me to handle them so they don’t get pushed aside and handled in a rush.


    Learn what skills you need to be a successful solopreneur in my free e-course “5 Essential Skills for Solopreneur Success:”

  16. Rikk Hansen says:

    This is something I needed to hear PJ. Thanks.

    And I love the idea to call it a “Date” – sounds more special. Do you find that the frequency that people schedule this with varies and is just an individual thing? Or do you have a recommendation for once-a-week, once-a-month?

    I’m going to get this in my calendar before the day is done.


    Rikk Hansen
    Founder, Brilliant NEXT

    Kindling Your Next LifeWork ~ to Blaze with Purpose & Passion!
    Career Renewal Special Report:

    • PJ Van Hulle says:

      Thanks, Rikk!

      How often you have your Money Date depends on you, how complicated your finances are, and what you want to accomplish in during your Money Date.

      For some people, have a Money Date once a month is enough.

      Personally, I really need to do it once a week to feel grounded and stay on top of things.

  17. Hi PJ,

    Love this. I have friends who do this weekly and call it Money Mondays. I am just getting on this track after years of avoidance:(

    It is amazing what has turned around by the new awareness I have received. Mindblowing!

    Love how supportive you are to other women entrepreneurs!

    Amanda Maynard
    Inner Guidance Coach/Spiritual Mentor
    Grab your copy of “Keys to Getting Unstuck and Connecting with Spirit!”

    • Beth Barany says:

      Amanda, That’s useful: Money Mondays, since I already set aside Monday for business admin. Thanks!

      PJ.. Thanks for your nugget of wisdom. It’s really helpful to me that you focus on the relationship. My husband and I have a standing monthly Play date where we travel the local region and go somewhere new, our kind of fun together. (Okay, one of our kinds of fun!) I do insist on spending time with the people I love and care about. I want to keep those relationships current. Why wouldn’t the same thing apply to money? Yes! So, nice reframe. I’m going to think about how I want to enhance my relationship with money, and ask myself: What would be fun?

      Sarah, I love your story of how you discovered the work you love. Your enthusiasm shines through! I’ll check out your offerings and Free Reports (Yeah!) because I love learning all I can about marketing, promotions, media communications. Then I love implementing and trying things on myself and my clients! How do we know what works unless we put it out there, right?!


      Beth Barany | Author, Speaker & Creative Consultant for Authors & Publishers
      Oakland, CA

      *Editor for the Author Entrepreneur Magazine, download the latest issue here: Yep! It’s free! Please share with your friends and colleagues!

  18. Cheryl says:

    Great post PJ! Since money is often the obstacle for many people to pursue their dreams and, the money date is a perfect way to stay on track to your true life calling.
    Cheryl Derricotte

  19. Lisa says:

    This is amazing! Thank you – I will definitely add this to my Calendar weekly!

    Lisa Byrd
    Scadaris Enchanted Metaphysical Shoppe
    Join my blog list for weekly Herbal Remedies! at

  20. My money is organized, I even have have 2 dates w/my money… where I run into trouble is keeping my dates. Nothing bothers me more than wasting money on late fees especially when it was from lack of planning and not because I didn’t have the money.

    Thanks for the reminder.

  21. PJ, this was great. Never considered having a relationship with my money. Just considered money as something I needed but didn’t care about. Yet, through this blog, I will commit to making a relationship with my money. I believe all those fees you talked about that I face will disappear as that is a negative aspect of the positive relationship. Thank you!

  22. Rita says:

    The idea of relationship speaks to my heart. Great advice PJ!

    Rita Tortorello
    HearStar MindBody Connection

  23. Una Doyle says:

    Hi PJ, great article.

    I’ve been having reasonably regular ‘money dates’ now for a while and it really does make a difference. They’d slipped slightly because of a change in my schedule however they’re back in the diary again now. Love calling them ‘money dates’ by the way!

    I really learned how important putting some structure around my finances and my business is from the Talent Dynamics of what I now teach to my corporate clients. As a Star Profile, with 0% of the energy that is good with systems and detail it’s been a hard lesson for me.

    However, as we say “your profile is not an excuse for bad behaviour!”, so I’ve learned to do it and much more planning and I really appreciate how motivating it is to know what’s ahead and to monitor and be able to act upon my key performance indicators… :-)

    Thanks again PJ :-)

    Una Doyle

    “I work with corporate leader/managers with Everest-like workloads, who are exhausted attempting to do more with an ever-shrinking pool of resources. I help them to achieve and exceed their numbers, get a good night’s sleep and be able to face themselves in the mirror in the morning.”

  24. PJ,

    Love how you lead the group to taking action. You’re post – Oh So True….I’m making a money date right now! Thanks for the reminder to be grateful for everything we have!

    Roberta E. Eastman
    Business Office Management Medic
    Roberta Eastman Enterprise
    Tel: (805) 930-9833

    Free Business Skills Assessment –
    9 Critical Skills You Must Have and How to Get Them Now!

  25. I like the way you frame it. Since the advent of debit cards, I have often been in chaos, and then fearful of checking in on the status of my account! So I finally committed to looking at my bank accounts (personal and business) almost obsessively every day, and I always know exactly where I am. It has made a huge difference in the quality of my stress levels, and I feel much more powerful than when I had no idea what was happening.

    Pamela Parker
    Attorney, licensed in Texas, caring all over the place

  26. Thanks for bringing this up its not the way we normally think or are taught about money. The idea of making a :money date” give it a higher priority. I need to do this and really look at how I really view money.



  27. Jody Maley says:

    I was in a millionaire women’s mentoring group and was asked by the speaker to empty our wallets…she said how we keep care of our money in our wallets is how we take care of it in our lives. I now can say that I keep it neat and clean, and put my receipts away when I get home.
    Having more money…and a date with money LOVE IT! giggle

    Jody Maley
    Owner HomePartyPlan
    Get your 5 Mistakes in your Home Business Here

  28. So clear, to get conscious about the money we do have. So much of prosperity consciousness exists in our minds, about how rich and abundant we feel. I started out as a waitress for the first ten years of my dance life in NYC, and got a visceral sense of “money in the hand”. One teacher said it was important for the gold to “cross your hand” before you give the advise, which is an interesting concept I am thinking about. This changes the attitude that we can discount our services or change with the wind. No, let the gold cross your hands first, which honors the transactions!

    Executive Director
    Be Soul

  29. Great post, PJ. I love the idea of a “money date.” I’m pretty on top of my finances in my business, but I don’t spend enough time analyzing my reports. I’m going to start making money dates to do that.

  30. Ashar says:

    That is such a brilliant idea. I thought I was doing pretty well, but can see how this just kicks it up a notch. Setting a money date will sure make more focused on analyzing reports instead of doing them randomly. Starting as of now.

    The Raw Snack PA
    ‘Just be you…naturally’

    Grab your instant energy boosting treats..for the working week

  31. Excellent tip, PJ! I do money for living. Would love for us to get together soon and discuss.

  32. Sumaya says:

    You are so right about needing to respect money and I like the idea of a money date.

  33. Thea Westra says:

    Top idea!
    As well as our lunch dates, Greg & I could have a weekly money date. Plus, there’s nothing to say that a “money date” can’t be romantic! :) lol I wonder what creative ideas I could build around our money date to make it extra fun and something to look forward to each week?

  34. Lorii Abela says:

    Great idea, PJ! Haven’t done ‘money-date’ will scheduled it next week. Thanks.

  35. Sabra Sasson says:

    Fantastic! Yes, I learned from someone else to monitor all of the money that I earn – which is so exciting. And, because of that it naturally has lead me to be on top of all of my financial responsibilities. I have always spent some time on the weekends making such that my bills were paid, and I still do that. Doing it every week means it doesn’t take too much of my time since I look at my finances so often. I also meet with my financial advisor on a regular basis.

    PJ this is such an excellent post. So many more people need to really show they care about their money, it just might help them to reduce their debt and get on track.

  36. raquel says:

    Thanks love the idea of a money date! I do that two times a month and I play music and make it romantic

  37. Leanne says:

    Oh, I love the concept of a money date! Thanks for sharing this idea, PJ! I’ll be modifying my bill paying/finances day :).

  38. Anne Perry says:

    Thanks for a great article, PJ and a great reminder to always respect money. I love the idea of having a Money Date as opposed to bill paying time. Who doesn’t look forward to a date and I look forward to my next money date!

  39. Kim says:

    PJ, I listened to your call on Soaring Over Setbacks. I really enjoyed your call. I am currently doing Deepak Chopra’s 21-day Prosperity Awareness and Creating Abundance Meditation Series, and when I saw your topic was prosperity consciousness, I was very excited. I have prayed recently that I would learn my money lessons and learn how to manifest and create abundance in my life. So I feel that you are part of a progressive answer to my prayer. I would like to attend one of your workshops. I am just starting the process, so once I have manifested some abundance, I will plan a trip to the west coast to attend. Thank you for the information on that call and here. I will continue to follow your advice and re-program my mind for prosperity consciousness.

  40. Erin Burch says:

    I think the relationship with money is extremely key to shifting into a prosperity consciousness. I am committed to writing down my spending events and keeping better track of my income, expenses, etc. It is exciting to finally get into a positive relationship with money. Whew! Looking forward to my money date!

  41. I must say that the money-date idea made me smile! I love that term and think it’s a great thing to do. I have money dates and am much better than I used to be I used to be. I know I could do better because often something will come up and the money date gets bumped

  42. Lynne says:

    Money Dates are crucial – I am just putting this into practice.
    And I can see that if I have regular “money dates” that I will have
    more mental time to be creative… :-)

  43. I love the idea of respecting your money. I try to treat all my money with respect, even small amounts. It seems to make a difference in my overall relationship to money.

    Learn the 5 Essential Skills you need for a Successful Solopreneur Business at

  44. Oh, I love the idea of a money date! Can we bring wine? :) Thanks for the great article PJ.

  45. Daniel says:

    Hi P.J.,
    Great blog post! I just had a conversation about money this morning with my coach. Specifically, my coaching fees and how I’ve tied them to my personal money beliefs.
    I like the idea of a ”money date” and setting aside time to care for the relationship with my dinero!

    Thanks again!


  46. TonyDee says:

    One of the most important qualities of relationship highlights money’s strong point. Money is one of the best in the business of listening, which is ‘the’ strengthen point of any relationship! :-)

  47. Karen Grosz says:

    Money dates are so important, but just like my relationship with my spouse, I can put it off because other things seem more important. I am schedule a money date and a date with my husband.

  48. Deb Brown says:

    This is a great idea, PJ! I created a habit of reviewing my money on a daily basis. I entered it as a recurring appointment in my calendar and I check my bank accounts online, review what bills are coming up and plan for them. By spending 5 minutes a day, it has helped me be on top of my finances.

    Deb Brown
    Chief WOW Creator
    Touch Your Client’s Heart

    Get your free Referral Partner Tracking Sheet and start building referral relationships.

  49. The idea of a “money date” fills me with dread! I just hate anything to do with accounts, but I think that makes it even more important for me to schedule it in!

  50. The “money date” is a more friendly way to think of a monthly financial review. It’s a term that’s much less likely to put some people off, and may even help them to look forward to doing it. Nice concept.

    Henry Matlock
    “The Writer Re-Igniter”

    Promote your service or products with teleseminars:
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  51. Money date is a fantastic phrase! It makes me feel like I want to spend time with my money. I think it shifts the feeling of money organization from one of work to one of fun! I am definitely going to name my financial time a money date from now on. Thank you PJ :)

    Eleanor Healy
    The True-Self Advocate

    Make peace with yourself–start with my free cheatsheet Five Ways to Feel More Confident

  52. Devin Bisanz says:

    I like reading all the comments!! My girl and I had a money date a few weeks ago. We decided to start shopping at the grocery store. Now we have more dishes, I haven’t had starbucks in forever, and I have to think about what I want to eat in advance. #toughlife

  53. I just recently having money dates. It was one of my promises to myself when I did my end of year ritual. It’s made such a huge difference in how I approach things. I truly believe that everyone should have at least one Money Date each month!!! <3

  54. PJ, Thanks for this insightful post. I love the idea of a money date! What a clever way to get excited about shaping the direction of your finances.

    As a child my mother lit the candle on one cupcake and savored it as she paid the monthly bills and reviewed the budget. She said it was in gratitude for the ability to pay and making room in our lives for more to come in.

    It’s now an exercise I use with my clients. I will now be suggesting everyone I know who wants to shift their consciousness around receiving money add a money date to their schedule.

    Great post. Thanks.

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  56. Jean Nash says:

    Thanks for this tip and reminder to treat money with respect. Love the idea of the money date. Has inspired me to pay closer attention to how I deal with my money and am going to set aside time to keep things in better order. Thank you, Blessings.

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